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You Can Always Count on Andrew - The Remix

Prompt: Star of Chaos, which demands a remix.  The Star of Chaos is a totem which calls upon the wild forces of nature which cannot be explained by the rigour of science alone. Andrew is unexplainable at times, is he not?
Setting: Leading up to this, in which Andrew's nose becomes intimately familiar with a saltshaker.
Rating: G

Makes mention of a few spell ingredients we need from other books...  Anybody want to help us out?  Join forces with the winning team?  ;)
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You Can Always Count on Andrew - The Remix



Day One
“Ow!  Bloody hell! What was that for?”
“Just checking.”

Day Two
“I’m not the bleeding First, you nit.”

Day Three
“Can I have my paprika back?  I was using it.”
“You were using it? ...  Get back here.”

Day Four
“Oh hey, Spike.  Good catch.  Nice to see you’re not the First.”

Day Five
“I swear on all you hold dear, if you don’t knock it off, Andrew...  That’s it.  Your comic books are in for a long and painful death.”

Day Six
“Peppercorns?  You’re pelting me with sodding peppercorns?  You know a friendly handshake would do the  – on second thought.  No.  Stay over there.  I said stay over there.”

Day Seven
“You said.”
“I said a handshake.  I did not say to wrap your nancy arms around me.”
“You know, you’re really grumpy.  Are you sure you’re getting enough to eat?”
“Been feeling the urge to avoid the kitchen of late.  I wonder why that is, Andrew.”
“Uh... too sunny during the day?”

Day Eight
“Back to the kitchen spices, I see.”
“Buffy said I wasn’t allowed to hug her anymore. ...  She smells nice.”

Day Nine
“Spike?  Spike... what are you doing?  Mr. Giles!  Help!”

Day Ten
“You really think garlic is going to protect you?”
“Um, If you’re a vampire.  Do you think it would still work if you’re the First pretending to be a vampire?”
“Ow!  You bleeding little – Wrong on both counts.”
“Oh, hey, look at that.  Guess the whole garlic thing is a myth, huh?  Wait – what are you –”
“You know what goes well with garlic?  Blood.  Human blood, straight from the source.”
“Yeah, but you wouldn’t do that... except you already – Mr. Giles!  Help!  Spike’s trying to drink my blood again!  And my neck still is still recovering from the last time.”

Day Eleven
“You just don’t give up, do you.”
“The First isn’t giving up, and neither should we.  And besides, you already ruined all my comic books, and Mr. Giles said you can’t threaten to eat me.  It’s not good form.”

Day Twelve
“Don’t – don’t you do it, Andrew.  I said –”

Day Thirteen
“Your reflexes are really sharp, did you know that?  Just think how much faster you’re getting.  It’s like I’m helping to train you.  You’ll thank me for that someday.  And for when I drive off the First before it can do any damage by impersonating you.”
“...”
“Uh, Spike?  You’re letting the salt spill everywhere, and I kinda need it.  You shouldn’t waste, you know.  It’s not good for the environment.  Or Buffy’s pocketbook.  And somebody is going to have to clean that up –”

Day Fourteen
“Oh, you’ve got to be sodding kidding me.  Knock it off, you wanker!”
“De Firdst will neber sneak padst me!”

.

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
dragonyphoenix
Oct. 24th, 2013 10:30 pm (UTC)
you already ruined all my comic books, and Mr. Giles said you can’t threaten to eat me. It’s not good form.” *laughs and laughs and laughs* I can't believe Spike ruined Andrew's comic books. Why, if he touched mine, I'd be totally kicking his butt! *grrrr*
spuffy_luvr
Oct. 26th, 2013 04:49 am (UTC)
Hee, glad you enjoyed. Thanks!
shapinglight
Oct. 25th, 2013 03:26 pm (UTC)
I'm glad Spike ruined his comic books. Horrid little boy.

Yes, it is me, Vivia, speaking, but he gets on my nerves, okay?.
spuffy_luvr
Oct. 26th, 2013 04:49 am (UTC)
I think Andrew gets on everybody's nerves. Even mother-earth-goddess-witches-of-light. :)

Thanks!
waddiwasiwitch
Oct. 29th, 2013 12:16 pm (UTC)
ROFL. So funny. Andrew's delusion is why I'm so fond of him. Yep - Andrew annoying Spike is great for helping him train. *snort*
readerjane
Nov. 3rd, 2013 04:00 pm (UTC)
WAH-ha-ha-haaaa!
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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